11/03/2007

MY LOVE IS CRIMINAL

I LOVE true crime stories. Any way I can get them. I don't discriminate. Give me a true crime and I'm all over that shit like flies. I endlessly watch stuff like Court TV Crime Stories, A&E's City Confidential, and Snapped on Oxygen (this one is narrated by Laura San Giacomo, whom I adore!).

The sound of the TV represents safety and companionship to me. Often I'm not even watching these shows but I need to hear the sound in the background to feel relaxed, which makes my programming choices even more strange.

HBO: Autopsy is the exception to the rule. I don't play this one in the background. I watch every second. I'm a huge fan of Dr. Michael Baden, board-certified forensic pathologist and medical doctor(thank you wikipedia). I see him on a bunch of the other shows, too. But really, this is his best work. His explanations of the condition of the corpses, the positions in which they were found, the degree of decay, and his general demeanor are so warm and soothing. He's way better than Dr. G. She's just so cold. I don't like that. Don't get me wrong, I watch her. I just don't like her as much as Dr. Baden.

I know what I like.

I read the books, too. One of my favorite true crime authors is Ann Rule. In fact I don't think I know another true crime author by name. She is the master and she came by it totally by accident. She had a job with Ted Bundy. So she wrote a book. And then she wrote a bunch more.

My favorite is Bitter Harvest about a doctor who poisoned her husband with a strange poison (ricin from castor beans, usually used to make castor oil) and her attention-seeking fire setting that ultimately resulted in the death of two of her three children. Holy shit. This chick was whacked.

I also highly recommend Every Breath You Take. Total nut jobs abound. Good times.

So , now you know a little more about me. Which might explain why I think the crazy whack-job mom from my kids old school murdered the mom with the heart condition who died suddenly at the end of my daughter's kindergarten year.

Seriously.

I think she did it.

The crazy whack-job thought the younger (and much prettier) woman was sleeping with her husband (which may or may not be true). The crazy whack-job threatened the life of the younger mom. The younger mom got a restraining order against the crazy lady. And then the younger woman died suddenly.

Hmmmm. Really?

I'm sayin'. I'm actually sayin'.

3 comments:

Heather said...

Can I just say I actually laughed out loud(rare for me unless it's really, really funny) when I got to the part where it said....I'm sayin'. I'm actually sayin'. Holy crap - that was the highlight of my day.

Lisa said...

I don't have cable. But NOW I wish I did. Love me some true crime stories too.

Gill said...

OMG .. you actually published your theory. I'm thinking your so next in line!