OK, it wasn't really a party. It was just a gathering of men (and 2 wives and 2 kids) watching rugby. Cause it's the rugby world cup, you know.

So Madigan had play practice until 6:00. And the guests were set to arrive between 6:00 and 6:30. And she had a ton of regular homework. And she has a report due on Thursday. Which is not yet complete. And she is running for student council vice president and the campaign speeches are Thursday so she has to practice that.

So she had to sit at the table doing homework all evening. She stopped to eat dinner with us all. But other than that she was doing homework until bedtime.

And I am mourning my little girl. The sweet baby whose head I had to smell whenever she was near. The toddler with the round face and the chubby little block feet. The preschooler who learned EVERYTHING and sang songs endlessly. The kindergartner watching the big kids with awe and fear. The elementary kid with some new interests and a little bit of cinchy homework.

It didn't last long enough. Those days went by too fast. I'm not ready for all this. I am ill prepared to have an independent young lady taking risks and sometimes getting hurt. My heart doesn't know she is older and has some life experience and has lots more to acquire before her days here come to an end. My heart thinks she just arrived on this planet brand new in need of constant supervision and direction. And regular kisses and snuggles. And the occasional hair stroking.

I wish I could be more excited and hopeful. Today I feel sad and overwhelmed. She apparently has a lot to teach me yet.


TX Poppet said...

In consideration of The Great Mofo Delurk today, I am sending this little comment your way. I enjoy reading your blog regularly and look forward to every new post.
Oh, and today's post made me a little teary. I'm right with you on this one.

Erica said...

Thank you for delurking. Thanks for your kind words. I am comforted by other moms in the trenches and that knowledge that we are all "winging it."

Mimi aka pz5wjj said...

followed you here from cr8buzz - and am leaving a comment as spare from yesterday's de-lurk.

My DH is all into the rugby too... He's English & we met while in Australia so he's very excited about the quarter final...

Momo Fali said...

It's really hard, isn't it? I can't get over how fast my daughter is growing.